Of Bedtimes, Bananas, and Balderdash

Once upon a time there lived a man and a woman and four darling children. These children laughed and played all the day until their parents tucked them in with prayers for a sweet dream and a long sleep. The evenings of solitude allowed the parents to recharge for yet another day of rearing, nurturing, loving, and laughing with these precious ones.

One day a fifth child appeared seemingly out of nowhere. Whereas all the previous births had been on the quiet side, this child entered the world SCREAMING! And while the previous four played together, shared willingly (most of the time), washed behind their ears, and supped without complaint, this newest one played by a different set of rules (and only she could read them). Not to be undone by the “newness” of this newest, the parents embraced her uniqueness and learned much from her. In fact, the entire family learned so much about ENTERTAINMENT because this latest delivery entertained everyone she met (some would even argue she enchanted them).

Now many long years have passed (nine and one-half to be precise, but it seems like many more), and the rituals of bedtime flow smoothly once again. The brushing of teeth, praying of prayers, and reading of quiet literature precede the closing of eyes and resting of bodies in preparation for another wonderful day here at Wisteria Cottage. The parents once again enjoy peaceful evenings of solitude and quiet while the children sleep; or so they thought . . .

These previously unreleased tapes attest to the fact that Miss Rachel may not, in fact, be following the prescribed rules set forth in the generally accepted principles of family life here at Wisteria Cottage. The management came upon these tapes by accident one evening at about 11:30 pm, when a decidedly un-sleepy young lady brought down the camera announcing the batteries seemed to be dead. Not bothering to glance at the clock nor assess the situation fully, the relaxed parents merely accepted the camera for recharge and bid the child an additional goodnight. The next day while recharging the camera the Father noticed some strange recordings. We have those for you today – further proof that Child #5 surely came from someplace special. View these clips and judge for yourself. [Caution: you will never view life at Wisteria Cottage in the same pink, placid light after seeing these clips.] We have it on the best of authority that further examples of Child #5 in action exist. Beware of the supposed sleeping child.

p.s.

Mom: "Why were you looking for bananas in the camera lens?"

Rachel: "Well, mom, you know when you're looking at the pc board inside the camera and you see all those little yellow things that look like bananas? I was just making a joke about that."

Mom: "Oh ..."

[Mom, muttering to self as she walks away, ... "Yellow things? ... pc board? ... ummmmmm .... okay ..."]